“………. and fully waterproof as 10 minutes in the River Vyrnwy has proved.”
Is there a story lurking in there?
Yep. Get a bag of popcorn and I will begin......are you sitting comfortably?
Once upon a time there was this very dapper Irishman living in Wales with the Keeper of the Purse (KOTP) and his beloved Rottie. He was a kindly man but after a disasterous experience with a pair of supposedly waterproof binoculars he vowed to dunk every new pair he bought from thence in the magical waters of the River Vyrnwy. Magical because it is beautiful, fast flowing ........and very wet.
The recent arrival of a pair of 'waterproof' Leica's and Zeiss binoculars meant that a visit to the waters was in order and so, along with Archie, he walked at a fast Infantrymans pace (140 to the minute to be precise) to the river bank and lowered the bino's to a depth of 1.5m, or 4'11', for 10 minutes using some old para-cord from his mispent days exiting perfectly serviceable aircraft.
Using a 33 year old Rolex Submariner (a 40th Birthday present from the KOTP) as his principal timepiece he noted that the ten minute marker on the uni-directional bezel was aligned with the minute hand and this was the signal to raise the bino's from the waters.
Hallelujah! Not a drop of the precious H2O had overcome the seals, a quick pat with some absorbent paper and caramba!, both were ready to observe the inquisitive family of Swans, who watched the two lunatics from a safe distance with an aura of disbelief and Swan-like indifference.
But the intrepid pair were not finished. Time to check out the toughness claim of the masculine Zeiss's. The elegant Leica's were left out of the next phase as they are a tad more feminine than the combat-ready Zeiss's and were not built to be dragged through the fields on a harness powered by a 45kg Rottweiler. And Leica, deep in the Portugese countryside do not shout out the Teutonic claims of toughness that eminate from Germany.
The Zeiss was clipped to Archie who, having been briefed on the exact test route to take, sped off as only a Rottie, who has clocked a Bonio dog biscuit dangling from a fence post, can.
It would be true to say that at this point, an element of 'WTF did I do that for' entered his Malt sozzled brain but the test must go ....err, on.
Bonio digested, the Zeiss were returned, unclipped and given the once over and to his astonishment they were in 'as new' condition.
'Tis true' he exclaimed in that soft and lilting tone that those who hail from Tipperary are blessed with, 'the Wizards of Oberkochern do not speak with forked tongue. Dem Conquests are as tough as old boots.'
The End.