Chickadeedeedee
Well-known member
What an absolutely delightful read! :t:
Thank you! Well done.
C3D
Thank you! Well done.
C3D
-
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Anthropomorphisation:Who are the chavs of the bird world ? (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter Mutter
- Start date
Sue Wright
Well-known member
Brilliant Kat, you kept me enthralled to the end and what perfect sense it made. Be careful not to muck it up Kat, it's great as it is.
One thing for certain.....it isn't Danny Dunnock that could be called a Chav, whatever the name truly implies. All the best Kat.
Sue
One thing for certain.....it isn't Danny Dunnock that could be called a Chav, whatever the name truly implies. All the best Kat.
Sue
Last edited:
Silvershark
Well-known member
Nope, Danny Dunnock most definately couldn't be a chav, I agree that it would probably be the starlings.
Here is the new version:
THE STORY OF DANNY DUNNOCK
In a back garden there lived many birds. Many craved the spotlight, seeking attention with their bright feathers and loud behaviour. But Danny Dunnock was not one of them.
No, Danny Dunnock was a quiet little bird. He spend most of his days hopping around beneath the hedgerow, leaping out occasionally to grab a tempting insect or the odd scattered seed. The other birds barely noticed him at all, hiding away in the dark undergrowth.
Danny Dunnock did want attention. He wanted to be the shining star, like all the other birds around him. He wanted his chance to be a movie star too.
But little Danny Dunnock had never been given the chance. Even as an extra, his name wasn’t worth a mention in the end credits. He didn’t feel he had the talent to compete with the other birds for the best parts, there was always someone that was better than him.
There was Wren. He didn’t look at all special, his feathers drab and brown. But Wren held a special talent, a musical talent. No other bird could rival this master of the opera, especially not Danny Dunnock.
Blackbird was the charming gentleman all dressed in black. Smart and sleek, he grabbed attention with his smooth style. Danny Dunnock was nothing compared to him.
The comic roles belonged to Starling. He was always ready to amuse, the stars on his back mirroring his sparkling personality he demanded attantion, and more often than not he got it. Danny Dunnock could never command such attention.
A role in a festive flick never passed without Robin Redbreast being offered a starring role. He captured the very essence of Christmas and that meant he was guaranteed a part. Danny Dunnock didn’t capture the essence of anything.
Dressed so smart in black and white, Magpie took parts magic and trickery, the sneaky pickpocket that everyone loved to hate. No one noticed Danny Dunnock to love to hate him.
Carrion Crow owned the part of the dark villain. He could play a menacing character with a natural ease. But Danny Dunnock knew no one would ever find him menacing.
The child star roles were always taken by the oh-so-cute Blue Tit, his cousin Great Tit taking on the roles of older sibling. Danny Dunnock was far from being so adorable.
The hero of black comedy was cheeky Jackdaw, ever ready to share his dark sense of humour with all those around him. There was nothing dark about Danny Dunnock.
The roles that were for the most handsome of stars were only ever offered to Goldfinch, the most attractive of them all. Danny Dunnock was not close to being anywhere near as good looking as him.
Greenfinch never failed to grab the rebellious parts, a bulky tough little character that was always getting into scrapes. Danny Dunnock knew that he couldn’t play a rebel nearly so well.
Being a master of imitation opened the doors to many roles for Thrush, he could impersonate anything from your mother to a pick-up truck. Danny Dunnock couldn’t even do a good impersonation of himself.
And the roles for the big, bumbling fool belonged to rather clumsy Woodpigeon. Danny Dunnock was far to small to be able to fit in his shoes.
There was no part anywhere that Danny Dunnock could possibly play, and he remembered this every single day. What movie role could exist that could only ever be for him? Not one that he could think of.
Sitting by the bird bath, Danny Dunnock gazed at his reflection in the still water. Why wasn’t he beautiful like Goldfinch? Why wasn’t he cute like Blue Tit? Why couldn’t he make it onto the big screen?
There was the flapping of feathers and a thud from behind him. Danny Dunnock turned his head to see that he was no longer alone. Sat right behind him was yet another star, one famed for his roles as a ruthless killer, a part Danny Dunnock stood no chance of getting. Sparrowhawk.
“You’re a bold chap.” Commented Sparrowhawk when Danny Dunnock failed to flee at his sudden appearance though all others around him had long since vanished.
“Not bold,” Danny Dunnock replied miserably, “Not heroic nor brave. I just know you are not hunting. And even if you were, you would never notice me amongst the flurry of the other birds.”
“Any how can you be sure of that?” Sparrowhawk asked, flexing his talons as he considered eating the little guy. But Danny Dunnock was right, he wasn’t hunting and wasn’t in the mood for eating.
“You’re stomach is bulging, you are full to bursting. You couldn’t eat another thing let alone be able to catch it.” responded Danny Dunnock.
“How very observant you are.” Sparrowhawk smiled, dipping his curved beak into the bath to take a refreshing drink.
“Observant yes, observed no.” Danny Dunnock moaned, “Everyone gets to enter the spotlight except me. When will it be my turn to be a movie star like all the other birds?”
Cocking his head onto one side, Sparrowhawk looked at him through his round amber eyes. “Perhaps when you discover what your talent is.” He suggested.
“I have no talent.” complained Danny Dunnock, “Anything I am good at someone else can do better. I can’t sing as well as Wren, I can’t make jokes as well as Starling, I can’t do magic as well as Magpie. I just hide in the background lurking. I’m not smooth and sophisticated like Blackbird. And I’m far from being able to play the ruthless characters that you can with such ease. I just watch others take the roles, wishing that just one of them could have been my own.”
Sparrowhawk looked at him, thinking. He had just been offered a new role. But the film was at a standstill until the perfect bird was found.
All of the others were far from being well-suited to this most important part. This part didn’t require someone bright and noticeable. Nor did it need someone festive and comic. It was a character that didn’t need a talent at song, and didn’t need to be cute and adorable. Someone good at dark humour or a clumsy fool were far from being suited. A menacing feel was far from what was needed.
No, this part was made for a bird that was observant. That picked up on small details to solve puzzling mysteries. A bird that didn’t stand out and could blend right into the background. To gather more clues and watch all the suspects without even being noticed at all.
Standing there, Sparrowhawk smiled. He knew the perfect part for Danny Dunnock. Leaning over, he whispered in his ear. Danny Dunnock’s eyes grew wide, delight mixed with fear. For such a huge part was a very big task for a little bird like him, but this was a part made exclusively for him. For no other bird held the traits that he offered. Danny Dunnock was very quick to take the chance. There was no way he could refuse.
Danny Dunnock realised at last, that he had been wrong to focus on all the other birds acts. He had spent so much time thinking about what they were and he was not, that he failed to think about who actually was. But in the end he had his own special qualities that only he could offer, and what a part these qualities had made him perfect for…
A few months later huge posters appeared drawing attention to the latest feature. Up at the top in big huge letters, it read:
DANNY DUNNOCK STARING AS THE MOST FAMOUS DETECTIVE OF THEM ALL…
SHERLOCK HOLMES!
Here is the new version:
THE STORY OF DANNY DUNNOCK
In a back garden there lived many birds. Many craved the spotlight, seeking attention with their bright feathers and loud behaviour. But Danny Dunnock was not one of them.
No, Danny Dunnock was a quiet little bird. He spend most of his days hopping around beneath the hedgerow, leaping out occasionally to grab a tempting insect or the odd scattered seed. The other birds barely noticed him at all, hiding away in the dark undergrowth.
Danny Dunnock did want attention. He wanted to be the shining star, like all the other birds around him. He wanted his chance to be a movie star too.
But little Danny Dunnock had never been given the chance. Even as an extra, his name wasn’t worth a mention in the end credits. He didn’t feel he had the talent to compete with the other birds for the best parts, there was always someone that was better than him.
There was Wren. He didn’t look at all special, his feathers drab and brown. But Wren held a special talent, a musical talent. No other bird could rival this master of the opera, especially not Danny Dunnock.
Blackbird was the charming gentleman all dressed in black. Smart and sleek, he grabbed attention with his smooth style. Danny Dunnock was nothing compared to him.
The comic roles belonged to Starling. He was always ready to amuse, the stars on his back mirroring his sparkling personality he demanded attantion, and more often than not he got it. Danny Dunnock could never command such attention.
A role in a festive flick never passed without Robin Redbreast being offered a starring role. He captured the very essence of Christmas and that meant he was guaranteed a part. Danny Dunnock didn’t capture the essence of anything.
Dressed so smart in black and white, Magpie took parts magic and trickery, the sneaky pickpocket that everyone loved to hate. No one noticed Danny Dunnock to love to hate him.
Carrion Crow owned the part of the dark villain. He could play a menacing character with a natural ease. But Danny Dunnock knew no one would ever find him menacing.
The child star roles were always taken by the oh-so-cute Blue Tit, his cousin Great Tit taking on the roles of older sibling. Danny Dunnock was far from being so adorable.
The hero of black comedy was cheeky Jackdaw, ever ready to share his dark sense of humour with all those around him. There was nothing dark about Danny Dunnock.
The roles that were for the most handsome of stars were only ever offered to Goldfinch, the most attractive of them all. Danny Dunnock was not close to being anywhere near as good looking as him.
Greenfinch never failed to grab the rebellious parts, a bulky tough little character that was always getting into scrapes. Danny Dunnock knew that he couldn’t play a rebel nearly so well.
Being a master of imitation opened the doors to many roles for Thrush, he could impersonate anything from your mother to a pick-up truck. Danny Dunnock couldn’t even do a good impersonation of himself.
And the roles for the big, bumbling fool belonged to rather clumsy Woodpigeon. Danny Dunnock was far to small to be able to fit in his shoes.
There was no part anywhere that Danny Dunnock could possibly play, and he remembered this every single day. What movie role could exist that could only ever be for him? Not one that he could think of.
Sitting by the bird bath, Danny Dunnock gazed at his reflection in the still water. Why wasn’t he beautiful like Goldfinch? Why wasn’t he cute like Blue Tit? Why couldn’t he make it onto the big screen?
There was the flapping of feathers and a thud from behind him. Danny Dunnock turned his head to see that he was no longer alone. Sat right behind him was yet another star, one famed for his roles as a ruthless killer, a part Danny Dunnock stood no chance of getting. Sparrowhawk.
“You’re a bold chap.” Commented Sparrowhawk when Danny Dunnock failed to flee at his sudden appearance though all others around him had long since vanished.
“Not bold,” Danny Dunnock replied miserably, “Not heroic nor brave. I just know you are not hunting. And even if you were, you would never notice me amongst the flurry of the other birds.”
“Any how can you be sure of that?” Sparrowhawk asked, flexing his talons as he considered eating the little guy. But Danny Dunnock was right, he wasn’t hunting and wasn’t in the mood for eating.
“You’re stomach is bulging, you are full to bursting. You couldn’t eat another thing let alone be able to catch it.” responded Danny Dunnock.
“How very observant you are.” Sparrowhawk smiled, dipping his curved beak into the bath to take a refreshing drink.
“Observant yes, observed no.” Danny Dunnock moaned, “Everyone gets to enter the spotlight except me. When will it be my turn to be a movie star like all the other birds?”
Cocking his head onto one side, Sparrowhawk looked at him through his round amber eyes. “Perhaps when you discover what your talent is.” He suggested.
“I have no talent.” complained Danny Dunnock, “Anything I am good at someone else can do better. I can’t sing as well as Wren, I can’t make jokes as well as Starling, I can’t do magic as well as Magpie. I just hide in the background lurking. I’m not smooth and sophisticated like Blackbird. And I’m far from being able to play the ruthless characters that you can with such ease. I just watch others take the roles, wishing that just one of them could have been my own.”
Sparrowhawk looked at him, thinking. He had just been offered a new role. But the film was at a standstill until the perfect bird was found.
All of the others were far from being well-suited to this most important part. This part didn’t require someone bright and noticeable. Nor did it need someone festive and comic. It was a character that didn’t need a talent at song, and didn’t need to be cute and adorable. Someone good at dark humour or a clumsy fool were far from being suited. A menacing feel was far from what was needed.
No, this part was made for a bird that was observant. That picked up on small details to solve puzzling mysteries. A bird that didn’t stand out and could blend right into the background. To gather more clues and watch all the suspects without even being noticed at all.
Standing there, Sparrowhawk smiled. He knew the perfect part for Danny Dunnock. Leaning over, he whispered in his ear. Danny Dunnock’s eyes grew wide, delight mixed with fear. For such a huge part was a very big task for a little bird like him, but this was a part made exclusively for him. For no other bird held the traits that he offered. Danny Dunnock was very quick to take the chance. There was no way he could refuse.
Danny Dunnock realised at last, that he had been wrong to focus on all the other birds acts. He had spent so much time thinking about what they were and he was not, that he failed to think about who actually was. But in the end he had his own special qualities that only he could offer, and what a part these qualities had made him perfect for…
A few months later huge posters appeared drawing attention to the latest feature. Up at the top in big huge letters, it read:
DANNY DUNNOCK STARING AS THE MOST FAMOUS DETECTIVE OF THEM ALL…
SHERLOCK HOLMES!
Silvershark
Well-known member
Glad you all liked 
@ Cathy H - I've seen a number of dunnocks in my garden at the same time, as many as five together which was odd. There seem to be two "regulars" that show each other little or no agression, but there seems to be some kind of dominant-subordinate thing going on. They don't share the feeders, when the dominant wants the feeder the other always moves out of the way with no fuss. There is a third dunnock that visits that IS treated with agression by at least one of the other dunnocks - I assume it is from a neighbouring territory. Agression towards that individual can be very nasty. The other two just seem to tolerate each other. When there were five in the garden my guess it was youngsters - either the adult offspring of the residents that the parents were trying to drive away or the young that had left a neighbouring territory.
@ Cathy H - I've seen a number of dunnocks in my garden at the same time, as many as five together which was odd. There seem to be two "regulars" that show each other little or no agression, but there seems to be some kind of dominant-subordinate thing going on. They don't share the feeders, when the dominant wants the feeder the other always moves out of the way with no fuss. There is a third dunnock that visits that IS treated with agression by at least one of the other dunnocks - I assume it is from a neighbouring territory. Agression towards that individual can be very nasty. The other two just seem to tolerate each other. When there were five in the garden my guess it was youngsters - either the adult offspring of the residents that the parents were trying to drive away or the young that had left a neighbouring territory.
Sue Wright
Well-known member
Hi Kat,
Well done AGAIN, you've made a wonderful job it Kat, brilliant. Actually I think Dunnocks sing quite beautifully, so if he doesn't need his Sherlock role anytime he can always step in as understudy to the Wren!
Sue
Well done AGAIN, you've made a wonderful job it Kat, brilliant. Actually I think Dunnocks sing quite beautifully, so if he doesn't need his Sherlock role anytime he can always step in as understudy to the Wren!
Sue
Silvershark
Well-known member
Sue & Terry said:
I think they have a beautiful song too actually, maybe he should have been the singing detective :bounce:
Sue Wright
Well-known member
Silvershark said:
Nice one Kat!!
Sue
Silvershark
Well-known member
mutleymacclad said:
Lets hope a Chav never discovers a new bird... :-O
Silvershark
Well-known member
Britner said:
Yeah but if its a bird that they think looks "Chavvy" and they keep it paste photos of it all over the net to show their friends giving it a Chav name until some ornithologist comes across the image and realises it as an entirely new species...
Silvershark
Well-known member
Britner said:
As long as they understand which "bird" is meant in the "birding"
Silver Lady
Silver Lady
Silvershark said:
Oh Kat...Well done you.What a lovely, heart lifting and enjoyable story... :clap:
